I don't usually post videos on here, but when a friend shared this video on facebook, I was moved to tears.
Turn off the music, blow this up to fullscreen, and just watch. Think about what Christ has done for you. No matter if you were the worst sinner in the world or have never done any "big" sins - without Christ we are all lost in darkness, bound for hell. And yet He sacrificed His life so that you and I might live... not for ourselves, but for Him.
Watch this with an open heart. Let the words change you. Join me in asking yourself, "Can I truly say that all I have is Christ?"
p.s. if you like this video, check out "prodigal," also by the same guy on youtube.
Showing posts with label God's love. Show all posts
Showing posts with label God's love. Show all posts
4.09.2012
Convicted
This post convicted me tonight.
To tell you in all honesty, I'm jealous of how the author of the blog talks about God. Even as a Christian, I know I don't let Him into my life that deeply. I fill my mind with so many other things - homework, responsibilities, friendships, dreams, hopes... and then slip God in there and hope that He penetrates all the other sections I've partitioned my mind into. It's like the boxes I once referred to.
I even did this on Easter. Out of any day you would think that Easter would point me to God's love, but instead my mind was filled with making sure I got enough homework done, practiced adequately, played the offertory at church well, talked to enough people, etc. The church service was good, with many truths that stood out to me that I could apply to my life. But as soon as I took note of them I tucked them away into a nice little corner of my brain and haven't looked at them since.
I desire an ever deeper relationship with God, but I don't have it. I don't even really seek it.
I don't mind being "the one who is obsessed about music" in my group of friends, so why do I shrink from being labeled as "the one who is obsessed with Jesus?" Why do I treat Him as a section of my tidy little life, when He desires all of me? It's no wonder that I don't feel close to Him - how can you feel close to someone who you constantly push away?
It's hard to admit failure, even when you are simply typing words on a screen, but this is true. I have failed in loving God more.
And yet this is where I am made aware of His grace, wafting around me like an invisible scent. So faint I fail to catch it most of the time. Only when I am aware of my own inadequacies do I take note of His grace and breathe it in.
And only then do I realize that I've been holding my breath this whole time.
To tell you in all honesty, I'm jealous of how the author of the blog talks about God. Even as a Christian, I know I don't let Him into my life that deeply. I fill my mind with so many other things - homework, responsibilities, friendships, dreams, hopes... and then slip God in there and hope that He penetrates all the other sections I've partitioned my mind into. It's like the boxes I once referred to.
I even did this on Easter. Out of any day you would think that Easter would point me to God's love, but instead my mind was filled with making sure I got enough homework done, practiced adequately, played the offertory at church well, talked to enough people, etc. The church service was good, with many truths that stood out to me that I could apply to my life. But as soon as I took note of them I tucked them away into a nice little corner of my brain and haven't looked at them since.
I desire an ever deeper relationship with God, but I don't have it. I don't even really seek it.
I don't mind being "the one who is obsessed about music" in my group of friends, so why do I shrink from being labeled as "the one who is obsessed with Jesus?" Why do I treat Him as a section of my tidy little life, when He desires all of me? It's no wonder that I don't feel close to Him - how can you feel close to someone who you constantly push away?
It's hard to admit failure, even when you are simply typing words on a screen, but this is true. I have failed in loving God more.
And yet this is where I am made aware of His grace, wafting around me like an invisible scent. So faint I fail to catch it most of the time. Only when I am aware of my own inadequacies do I take note of His grace and breathe it in.
And only then do I realize that I've been holding my breath this whole time.
3.16.2012
My prayer for this day
Oh Lord,
Just knowing that You are near satisfies my soul. There is nothing I can compare You to - my deepest aching longing, the cry for perfect all-knowing-yet-all-accepting love, the joy of unexpected kindness, a warm embrace, sudden sunshine on my face - all is a pale shadow, a dim fuzzy image of You.
You are the reason I live, the reason I get up each morning and breath and work and love and learn. You are the reason for me to reach out in love and brokenness to other hurting people - regardless of if they look like they have it all together or if they push me away and hurt me. Regardless of how I'm feeling or how my pride says to stop wasting my efforts on them or if they have begun to fade from my life. You have given me a call to love, and so love I must.
Come fill my mind and my heart with the overwhelmingly joyful fact that You love me always. You loved me first. And when this truly sinks in - how can I help but respond in overflowing praise and adoration?
Oh Lord, help me to love today, in ways that are not just sweet or thoughtful but ways that show You.
In my Savior Jesus' name I pray,
Amen
Just knowing that You are near satisfies my soul. There is nothing I can compare You to - my deepest aching longing, the cry for perfect all-knowing-yet-all-accepting love, the joy of unexpected kindness, a warm embrace, sudden sunshine on my face - all is a pale shadow, a dim fuzzy image of You.
You are the reason I live, the reason I get up each morning and breath and work and love and learn. You are the reason for me to reach out in love and brokenness to other hurting people - regardless of if they look like they have it all together or if they push me away and hurt me. Regardless of how I'm feeling or how my pride says to stop wasting my efforts on them or if they have begun to fade from my life. You have given me a call to love, and so love I must.
Come fill my mind and my heart with the overwhelmingly joyful fact that You love me always. You loved me first. And when this truly sinks in - how can I help but respond in overflowing praise and adoration?
Oh Lord, help me to love today, in ways that are not just sweet or thoughtful but ways that show You.
In my Savior Jesus' name I pray,
Amen
2.28.2012
Undeserved Favor
And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God. ~Ephesians 3:16b-19
For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do. ~Ephesians 2:8-10
I've seen firsthand the effects of showing God's kind of love to other people. Unconditional love (which can only come from God), has the power to change people, to build them up, strengthen their faith, and encourage their hearts.
But recently I've also been challenged to show grace to others. Grace is unmerited favor - mercy and kindness that goes beyond what I think a person deserves. Grace and love are close to synonymous, but not quite. I believe grace has more to do with showing another person kindness, care, love, mercy, forgiveness - no matter if you think they deserve it or not. In a way it goes beyond love by actively seeking the best for that other person.
When I usually think of showing other people grace, I think of being able to forgive someone who has wronged or hurt me. But grace goes beyond that. It also is simply showing people how much God loves and cares for them - no matter who they are or what road their path is on. It's reminding and revealing to people how much God was willing to sacrifice because he desires a relationship with them.
I want to be that kind of person - who shows God's grace to all around me. And the only way that will happen is if I first know and experience His grace in my own life.
7.27.2011
Dear friends...
Today is my birthday!
God has blessed me so much this past year - He's taught me the meaning of His strength, His joy, and His peace no matter what circumstances I'm facing. He's blessed and enriched my life - and I can't wait to see what is in store for this next year!
On this occasion, I thought it would be fitting to share one of my poems with you. I hope you enjoy it. :)
Just the way the sky looks,
Peace floating in the air,
A song carrying the breeze,
Joy coming from nowhere.
Satisfaction striking me
With sudden clarity.
Love sparkling my sight
With all the creativity of light.
Oh, stop and savor
The flavor
Of God’s presence –
In this world,
In this life,
In me.
© Melody 2010
God has blessed me so much this past year - He's taught me the meaning of His strength, His joy, and His peace no matter what circumstances I'm facing. He's blessed and enriched my life - and I can't wait to see what is in store for this next year!
On this occasion, I thought it would be fitting to share one of my poems with you. I hope you enjoy it. :)
Stop and savor
The flavor
Of God’s presence.
The flavor
Of God’s presence.
Just the way the sky looks,
Peace floating in the air,
A song carrying the breeze,
Joy coming from nowhere.
Satisfaction striking me
With sudden clarity.
Love sparkling my sight
With all the creativity of light.
Oh, stop and savor
The flavor
Of God’s presence –
In this world,
In this life,
In me.
© Melody 2010
4.09.2011
The Longing for Love
The longing for love - that aching, sweet sensation - lies within all of us. No matter if we admit this desire and need or go our whole lives forbidding ourselves to ever partake in it, it is there. Love is what drives us to get up in the morning, what makes us invest in people, what makes us share part of ourselves with others. It consumes all of us, whether we are conscious of it or not.
We want so desperately to be loved.
Some display unashamed, abandoned neon signs saying "LOVE ME!". Others hide their longing deep inside.
Yet each one feels just as deeply.
Some have experienced deep, tearing rejection of their love, while others have never even been given a taste.
Yet each one hurts just as deeply.
Some share their heart timidly, piles of past pain masking their true depth of emotion. Others push themselves on anyone they can find, desperate for at least one who will listen with their heart and not just their ears.
Yet each one desires to be heard.
Some create vivid words, melodies, pictures which give perfect expression to the depth of their emotion. Others can't even make their mouth form the words, "I love you."
Yet each one has the same longing to express themselves.
All of these longings for love are simply trying to find their satisfaction in people. This isn't bad in itself, because God made us as relational beings. But, no mere person will fill the empty void inside that so many wish could be filled. God is the one who created the void, and He is the only one who can fill it completely.
We are made not only to be loved, but to love. We are made to be filled with Christ, and then to channel that love through to others. And if we are filled with Christ's love, we will never run dry. Our thirst and the thirst of those around us will always be quenched with Him.
Where do you look to for fulfillment of this longing? When someone rejects you, who do you go to? When you're having a bad day, what do you do? I challenge you to examine yourself and see what God may lay on your heart about seeking love and fulfillment in the wrong places.
And we have this glorious hope that no matter how twisted or torn our view of love may be, the True Love is waiting with open arms for us to run into them and find perfect peace and rest.
We want so desperately to be loved.
Some display unashamed, abandoned neon signs saying "LOVE ME!". Others hide their longing deep inside.
Yet each one feels just as deeply.
Some have experienced deep, tearing rejection of their love, while others have never even been given a taste.
Yet each one hurts just as deeply.
Some share their heart timidly, piles of past pain masking their true depth of emotion. Others push themselves on anyone they can find, desperate for at least one who will listen with their heart and not just their ears.
Yet each one desires to be heard.
Some create vivid words, melodies, pictures which give perfect expression to the depth of their emotion. Others can't even make their mouth form the words, "I love you."
Yet each one has the same longing to express themselves.
All of these longings for love are simply trying to find their satisfaction in people. This isn't bad in itself, because God made us as relational beings. But, no mere person will fill the empty void inside that so many wish could be filled. God is the one who created the void, and He is the only one who can fill it completely.
We are made not only to be loved, but to love. We are made to be filled with Christ, and then to channel that love through to others. And if we are filled with Christ's love, we will never run dry. Our thirst and the thirst of those around us will always be quenched with Him.
Where do you look to for fulfillment of this longing? When someone rejects you, who do you go to? When you're having a bad day, what do you do? I challenge you to examine yourself and see what God may lay on your heart about seeking love and fulfillment in the wrong places.
And we have this glorious hope that no matter how twisted or torn our view of love may be, the True Love is waiting with open arms for us to run into them and find perfect peace and rest.
2.08.2011
Your Right Hand
I've been having a lot of pain recently. Last Thursday I had a migrane, and over the weekend my arms and hands have been experiencing pain and just overall weakness. I've only practiced piano for about an hour all together since last Thursday. (To put this in perspective, I would normally practice about 2 hours a day, which would have been 8 hours total this weekend.)
Today, while my hands weren't experiencing sharp pains, they did get tired super quickly. After only about 15 minutes of practicing, they were dead beat and worthless.
When I can't play piano, I feel awfully useless.
And yet - God provides! He brought this verse to my attention tonight, and with it tears of joy and comfort:
After all, God does say in verse 10 of the same chapter:
So, I will trust my Father. I will put my poor, tired, weak little hand in His big, strong, warm one, and let Him take care of it. Isn't His right hand so much stronger than mine anyways?
Just to let you all know, I've talked with my piano teacher and my chiropractor about my hands, and they think it's muscle strain. So it probably isn't anything serious; I just have to rest them for a little while.
Today, while my hands weren't experiencing sharp pains, they did get tired super quickly. After only about 15 minutes of practicing, they were dead beat and worthless.
When I can't play piano, I feel awfully useless.
And yet - God provides! He brought this verse to my attention tonight, and with it tears of joy and comfort:
For I am the Lord, your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you. ~Isaiah 41:13When I saw that verse, my eyes filled with tears. It is my right arm especially that is hurting. I felt as if God was saying to me: "I am the Lord, Melody, I am your God. I will take hold of your right hand - yes, the one that is hurting - and quiet your fears. No matter how long it may be weak or what may be wrong with it, I will be here. I will help you."
After all, God does say in verse 10 of the same chapter:
So do not fear, for I am with you;
Do not be dismayed, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you and help you;
I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."
So, I will trust my Father. I will put my poor, tired, weak little hand in His big, strong, warm one, and let Him take care of it. Isn't His right hand so much stronger than mine anyways?
Just to let you all know, I've talked with my piano teacher and my chiropractor about my hands, and they think it's muscle strain. So it probably isn't anything serious; I just have to rest them for a little while.
9.29.2010
Time and Tide Go Washing by...
Starfish (click to listen)
Hearing this song always stirs up deep feelings in me. A sense of peace, longing, lightness, and a sadness which is hard to find the reason for. These feelings are so different, yet they mix around inside me to form something completely new which I have no name for.
Usually when this song comes around on my mp3 player, I skip over it because I just don't want to think about all the memories and nostalgia that comes along with it. But tonight I let it continue. When I hear this song, I always am reminded of my friend who introduced the song to me. We were talking about the song, and she was sharing how she hates the feeling of life flying by. She wishes that she could have the attitude like the song says, "Tide and time go washing by... and you don't even care."
I'm sad when I hear this song, because it reminds me of how far away I am from her (locationally). Reminds me of things I feel that are ending; longings I have that I cannot explain.
Separation. Endings. Longing. All these words are painful. But they're a good kind of pain almost. Like the pain you get when you're getting a massage and the massage therapist is working on a particularily sore or stiff muscle. It hurts, but you know that's only because it's making it better.
Separation hurts, but the reason it hurts is because it's making it better. Do I really believe that? Can I truly say "Yes, this hurts, but I also know that it is serving a better purpose in my life?" Can I actually believe that the sadness I may feel is only temporary, and actually serves to highlight God's glory & meaning for my life?
These are the questions I was asking myself as I was writing this blog post. Thankfully, I was interrupted at this point by the strains of my cell phone's ringtone. It was that very same friend.
God has a way of putting things in your path just exactly when you need them, doesn't he? He guided my friend to call me at just that moment when I was asking myself those questions (and feeling like the only answer I could truly say to them was "no"). He nudged me to be real with her, and then gave her just the right words to say to me.
And you know what I find? It's okay to be sad. God meant for us to feel the pain of separation and loneliness and sorrow and heartache and whatever other pain that's in our life. But there's a purpose for it, and that's what I'm holding on to. How could God use our lives to glorify Him if they were all sunshine and roses? Only in the sorrow and sadness do we have real need to hold on to Him. Only then can we realize full dependence on Him.
Just to let you know, I am writing a post answering all of your interesting questions you asked in my last post, but this was just what was on my heart this evening and I thought I would share.
Hearing this song always stirs up deep feelings in me. A sense of peace, longing, lightness, and a sadness which is hard to find the reason for. These feelings are so different, yet they mix around inside me to form something completely new which I have no name for.
Usually when this song comes around on my mp3 player, I skip over it because I just don't want to think about all the memories and nostalgia that comes along with it. But tonight I let it continue. When I hear this song, I always am reminded of my friend who introduced the song to me. We were talking about the song, and she was sharing how she hates the feeling of life flying by. She wishes that she could have the attitude like the song says, "Tide and time go washing by... and you don't even care."
I'm sad when I hear this song, because it reminds me of how far away I am from her (locationally). Reminds me of things I feel that are ending; longings I have that I cannot explain.
Separation. Endings. Longing. All these words are painful. But they're a good kind of pain almost. Like the pain you get when you're getting a massage and the massage therapist is working on a particularily sore or stiff muscle. It hurts, but you know that's only because it's making it better.
Separation hurts, but the reason it hurts is because it's making it better. Do I really believe that? Can I truly say "Yes, this hurts, but I also know that it is serving a better purpose in my life?" Can I actually believe that the sadness I may feel is only temporary, and actually serves to highlight God's glory & meaning for my life?
These are the questions I was asking myself as I was writing this blog post. Thankfully, I was interrupted at this point by the strains of my cell phone's ringtone. It was that very same friend.
God has a way of putting things in your path just exactly when you need them, doesn't he? He guided my friend to call me at just that moment when I was asking myself those questions (and feeling like the only answer I could truly say to them was "no"). He nudged me to be real with her, and then gave her just the right words to say to me.
And you know what I find? It's okay to be sad. God meant for us to feel the pain of separation and loneliness and sorrow and heartache and whatever other pain that's in our life. But there's a purpose for it, and that's what I'm holding on to. How could God use our lives to glorify Him if they were all sunshine and roses? Only in the sorrow and sadness do we have real need to hold on to Him. Only then can we realize full dependence on Him.
And only after the night comes the morning - with the sunshine of overwhelming joy and delight.This is what I'm holding on to -- no matter how time and tide go washing by.
Just to let you know, I am writing a post answering all of your interesting questions you asked in my last post, but this was just what was on my heart this evening and I thought I would share.
7.28.2010
Happiness In Every Direction
I decided to link up to Carlotta's blog hop about Happiness - because I truly have a whole lot to be happy for!
First off, Awel Prince asked me to be a guest poster on her blog, and I posted my blog post today! I felt very honored that she asked me to post on such a beautiful blog as hers. Click on the button she made to go and see what I posted:
Secondly, because of my birthday yesterday, I feel extremely happy, joyful, ecstatic, filled... and the adjectives could go on. I felt so loved and blessed it was beyond belief. :D
I had a small party with my good friends, and truly had a blast. We did everything that I love to do - had a photoshoot, ate a scrumptuous dinner of chicken pot pie (my favorite meal ever) with apple pie made by yours truly for dessert, did some writing, and sang & played music for each other. It was such a fun time - and I think the thing that made it the most special was that each of these girls that I love dearly got along so well! Though my friends are few, each of them is a treasure to me. God has brought each of them into my life for a reason, and I am so glad to have had this blessed time with them before going off to college!
We did something really special after dinner where my friends and family wrote little messages to me on long strips of paper, and then rolled them up and put them into little pill capsules. This will be such a blessing to me when I'm away at college and feeling homesick or lonely or just down. I can just take a "pill" and read a special message from a special person to cheer me up. :D
And the thoughtful, sweet post my friend wrote for me yesterday plus the birthday wishes you all posted for me were just the icing on my cake! Thank-you, my friends. You are all so sweet. :)
God really blessed me over and abundantly yesterday, to the point where I wondered how I could ever feel any more blessed and loved. And I know He will continue to bless me in the year to come as I seek His face.
Surely goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever. ~Psalm 23:6
7.24.2010
Coasting on Compliments
Everyone likes to get compliments, right?
When someone hands me a genuine compliment, I feel like they're handing me a treasure chest with diamonds and rubies inside. The joy and love I feel from these compliments shine in my eyes far above any precious gem.
Yet I've found something very dangerous about this treasure. It is so easy to become fixed upon it, desiring still more and more. My hunger for it is never filled, because the precious jewels of compliments are only earthly, temporary treasures. Yet it is so easy to put it above everything else and make it the one thing I'm living for. So easy to get into the mindset that my life is worthless unless I can receive a compliment from someone.
You know how sometimes when you realize a problem you swing to the opposite extreme? I've done that with compliments. Instead of basking in compliments (and even fishing for them), I will discredit each one I get. I think "Oh, that person just said that because it was the right thing to say in this situation," or "Well of course they don't mean that." I might even say something to them like, "Thanks," but they can tell from my voice that I don't really think I deserve the compliment. This, unfortunately, isn't the right way to handle compliments either. It's only the opposite end of the same coin.
All these wrong ways to handle compliments. What is the root problem? In essence, it all comes down to worth and what you derive it from. When I fish for compliments and hold them close, I'm trying to get my worth from the people around me. I figure as long as I look good in others' eyes, I must be valuable. When I discredit compliments and myself, I'm trying to get my worth from a false sense of humility. I figure as long as I look like I'm being humble, I must really be humble deep down inside.
But where is my sense of worth supposed to come from? From God, my Maker and Creator. If I view myself rightly in relationship to Him, only what He says about me really matters. And you know what He has said about me? In John 15:9, Jesus says, "As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love."
Still, when you receive compliments, you should take them! I recently found a quote from Corrie Ten Boom that fits this perfectly. She had an interesting approach to compliments that I think strikes a balance. She says, "When people come up and give me a compliment... I take each remark as if it were a flower. At the end of the day I lift up the bouquet of flowers I have gathered throughout the day and say, 'Here you are, Lord, it is all Yours.'"
This is the perfect balance. I recognize that my worth is in Christ alone, yet I can still accept compliments. If I take each rose and daisy with thankfulness and appreciation, I can then thank God for the compliment and the person who gave it to me.
So what about you? Where in your life do you "coast on compliments?" How do you accept them gracefully?
When someone hands me a genuine compliment, I feel like they're handing me a treasure chest with diamonds and rubies inside. The joy and love I feel from these compliments shine in my eyes far above any precious gem.
Yet I've found something very dangerous about this treasure. It is so easy to become fixed upon it, desiring still more and more. My hunger for it is never filled, because the precious jewels of compliments are only earthly, temporary treasures. Yet it is so easy to put it above everything else and make it the one thing I'm living for. So easy to get into the mindset that my life is worthless unless I can receive a compliment from someone.
You know how sometimes when you realize a problem you swing to the opposite extreme? I've done that with compliments. Instead of basking in compliments (and even fishing for them), I will discredit each one I get. I think "Oh, that person just said that because it was the right thing to say in this situation," or "Well of course they don't mean that." I might even say something to them like, "Thanks," but they can tell from my voice that I don't really think I deserve the compliment. This, unfortunately, isn't the right way to handle compliments either. It's only the opposite end of the same coin.
All these wrong ways to handle compliments. What is the root problem? In essence, it all comes down to worth and what you derive it from. When I fish for compliments and hold them close, I'm trying to get my worth from the people around me. I figure as long as I look good in others' eyes, I must be valuable. When I discredit compliments and myself, I'm trying to get my worth from a false sense of humility. I figure as long as I look like I'm being humble, I must really be humble deep down inside.
But where is my sense of worth supposed to come from? From God, my Maker and Creator. If I view myself rightly in relationship to Him, only what He says about me really matters. And you know what He has said about me? In John 15:9, Jesus says, "As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love."
This is the perfect balance. I recognize that my worth is in Christ alone, yet I can still accept compliments. If I take each rose and daisy with thankfulness and appreciation, I can then thank God for the compliment and the person who gave it to me.
So what about you? Where in your life do you "coast on compliments?" How do you accept them gracefully?
7.19.2010
Just... stop
I've been feeling overwhelmed with stuff to do recently. Somehow, though college was on the horizon, I didn't realize how fast it was approaching! It's like one of those things you stare at waiting for it to arrive, and then as soon as you take your attention off of it, it's upon you!
I've been juggling school shopping, backpacks, closet cleaning, class schedules, dorm rooms, medical forms, professors, meal plans, and everything in between. Not to mention planning for my birthday, the recording of my CD, getting quality time with my friends & family before college, and vacation plans. It reminds me of a poem I wrote awhile back in my senior year:
Fast Lane
I've been juggling school shopping, backpacks, closet cleaning, class schedules, dorm rooms, medical forms, professors, meal plans, and everything in between. Not to mention planning for my birthday, the recording of my CD, getting quality time with my friends & family before college, and vacation plans. It reminds me of a poem I wrote awhile back in my senior year:
Fast Lane
I've spent all my life
On the side of the freeway
Wondering what it'd be like
To drive in the fast lane.
But now that I'm there,
I realize the grass isn't greener.
In fact, there is no grass.
And even if there were,
I'm going too fast to see it.
copyright Melody 2009
Yep, that just about sums up my feelings right now. And yet I know it shouldn't be that way!
I need to stop. Stop and think, and reflect on how great my God is. He's really been doing awesome things lately, if only I will stop and realize it.
For one thing, He matched me up with a roommate who has more in common with me than I ever could have asked for! I've been really anxious about my roommate, wondering what she'll be like and if we'll like each other and be able to get along. Well, my God sure showed me! When I talked with her on the phone yesterday, we found out that we're both homeschooled (or were, rather), we're both rather introverted, and we're both music majors! I felt so amazed and blessed that God orchestrated that for me. He cares about even the details I think are too impossible to ask Him for. :)
And another thing: My friend Violet was going through a rough time with money issues for college, and really wondering if she would be able to go. My parents and I prayed with her about it, and the next morning, she called me up and told me that God had answered our prayer! Some people who owed her money were going to pay her so she would have enough for her first payment! Praise the Lord!
If only I stop and look around me - I realize just how good my God is. Whenever I feel discouraged or burned out, I need only to turn to Him. His love is what brings a smile to my face, what fills my heart with joy and peace and hope. And I know He's waiting with blessings in His arms.
4.28.2010
To the Brides of Christ
Violet at All For The Love Of Chaos posted this beautiful essay she has written. It is called, "The Window of Your Heart" and she wrote it specifically for Christian girls... the brides of Christ. It is one of the most beautiful things I have read about Christ's love for His own.
You sit there, against that Wailing Wall of your room, wondering if you are ever going to make it though this mess they call Life. Everywhere you turn someone puts you down, and the tears that stain your heart mark the pain and the burden of your rejection. Love… you are yearning for love.
But wait! Hope is coming like the Spring’s beauty after Winter’s frost. You have not been abandoned, you are not alone. There is a Lover who pursues you, and longs for you to notice Him. He is waiting.
He loves you so much that he knocks at the door of your heart, and stands in line patiently with the others. He longs for you to pick him & invite Him into your heart, and His heart shatters each time you choose someone or something else to be the love of your life.
He loves you so much He puts His strongest, fastest angels to take care of you, and watches your every move. Tears spring to His eyes when you don’t accept His angel’s help and protection, and instead accept the strength of some mortal protector, who, in the end, cannot shield you from the Enemy’s attacks.
He loves you so much He wants to give you the whole world and He does. He gives you the moon, and the stars, and lies in the grass with you, pointing out every little point of light, His heart soaring because you like it. He took so long to paint the sky so it would be beautiful for you, hoping, knowing, that it would touch your heart.
Flowers? He loves you so much He brings you flowers, millions of flowers, and shows you his sense of humor by bringing them even in the form of dandelions or ragweed. He beautifully packages His flowers in colors of green and yellow and red and purple, orange, pink, blue, white… all the colors of the rainbow. He knows you love them, and they are labeled “From your Secret Admirer. You’ve always longed for a Secret Admirer, someone who pursued you because you were beautiful, alluring, lovely… well, you do.
He is so much in love with you that he doesn’t care about your past. He gets down on His knees and begs you: “I love you, I have loved you for as long as I remember. Please tell me that you love me,” He pleads.
He is valiant. He fights the demons that hold you, the addictions, the obsessions, the sin that has you in chains, a phantom of fear cast around your heart. He hears your screams to be rescued, loves you so much to throw Himself at the dragon and fight for you. He could have left you to die, there are other girls who are easier to come by, who would love it if He even gave them a glance. But no… He gave them up for you. He loves you, and will go to all lengths, all risks, to get you, to prove to you His love.
He is close, and sensitive, embracing you when your heart weeps, when your life breaks apart into a million pieces. He carries you when you get scared in the storm, and comes looking for you, crying out your name, when the hurricane of your thinking separates you. He tears up about your pain when you open up to him, and with gentle hands He heals you.
He is thoughtful. In the morning He wakes you softly with the rays of the sun and the melodious songs of birds. He whispers you good morning and kisses you with the soft breeze coming in through the open window. Even on a gloomy day he has a special surprise only for your heart to know and understand. He tells you of His plans, of His purpose, and how much He desires to be with you within the pages of His love letters to you. And He is downcast and so dejected when you pass up reading His words to you for some other book or method of leisure. You allow someone or something else to romance and allure your heart, and it brings tears to His eyes and pain to His heart. He knows how weak that someone or something is, and how weak you are.
He cries out to you, longs for you to look at Him. But your gaze is fixed on someone else. The Enemy. The Enemy has captured the gaze of His beloved.
He loves you so much that He waits, even though you left Him. When you realize that the Enemy’s tune-less murmur in your ear is taking you away from He who cherishes you, you will cry out to Him. He will valiantly rescue you again. He loves you so much He will throw thousands of angels up against the Enemy, only to get you back. And he loves you so much, he will rescue you again, and again, and again, and again. Nothing you can do will make Him get angry with you enough to leave you. And He will never let the Enemy harm you. He will not leave you, He will not desert you. Although you might reject Him, He will wait patiently, pursuing your heart until you return to his arms, safe once more.
But He does not wait motionless; no. Every single moment you are away, in the Enemy’s lair, he is resless. He calls for you, runs to you, trying to make you notice Him. He does not rest until you are rescued, safe. He pleads with you, begs you, trying to gently tell you that the way you are going leads to destruction, and heartache. His heart breaks when you let the Enemy plug your ears. He screams in anguish when you let the Enemy lead you, knowing it is towards Destruction.
“Take anything else!” He cries. “Take anything else! My home, my creation, my crown, even myself, if only you would spare my beloved! Take me instead, not her! Please!”
He loves you so much He ran into the land of Shadow to bring you out. The Enemy tied Him up with the chains destined for you. He was blamed for your addictions; He felt the pain of your abuse; He cried out when the burden of your sin was thrown upon him, wrung around His throat. He looked at you, His starry eyes tearing, as His Enemy pushed Him into the abyss, instead of you.
He loves you so much he took your past from you: your impurity, your abuse, your pain, your ugliness, your infliction, your depression, your loss, your disability, your weakness, your arrogance, your ignorance, your poverty, your nakedness, your embarrassment, your unloveableness, your scorn, your hurt, and ultimately, ultimately… your brokenness.
But… He is powerful. He is strong. So powerful, He defeated the Enemy. He defeated your sin! No longer does the Enemy’s lairs have power over you. Your addictions have been taken away from you… you are free! Your anger has been vanquished… Smile: you are free! You are whole, perfect, pure- the scars of abuse have been taken away… you are free! The traces of darkness, ugliness and depression have been washed away… He is victorious; rejoice! You are free! The loss, the wounds of that which was ripped away from you by Death, by Poverty… by the forces of the Enemy, are restored… You are free!
And He runs, galliantly, towards you, arms open wide, ready to accept you into them. Tears streaming joyfully down His face, the light and beauty of His Kingdom filling the defeated darkness of the Enemy, He throws you up into the air, and catches you, embracing you. Finally you are together, free. And when you are with Him, you are who you were made to be. He completes you.
Hand in hand He walks you down a glorious path in the woods. Butterflies, wild flowers, a shimmering brook rushing over smooth rocks and stones and cascading over them into a deliciously cool pond… Rabbits scamper as you swim and bask in the sunlight.
Then He pulls you up, out of the Valleys and into the Clouds. Up over the trees and into the mountains. The sunset sets the rocks afire. A warm, crackling campfire, roasting marshmallows and hot dogs and talking softly… You lean your head against His chest and even the chill of the starry night air can't get to you, because He is holding you. With Him, you are whole. You are free.
He shows you many things, talks to you. And He wants you to talk to Him, about everything. He wants you to let Him know you.
When you feel alone, head in your hands, back against a wall, He comes walking up the aisle with His hands shoved in His pockets. He gives you a small smile and squats next to you, eyes searching, asking you to tell Him what is wrong.
When you are happy, rejoicing over an accomplishment, He throws you a party. He breaks out a grin and invites all of your friends. “Look how fantastic she is… I don’t know what I’d do without her!” He exclaims.
When you are stressed, and cant seem to get anything right, His arms embrace your world and your heart, and just holds you. In His hands, you will be safe, and your heart will be healed. Your pain will soon go away, and in His hands you will be healed.
When the end seems to come too soon…
When you feel as if life is not worth living…
When you cant cope…
When you feel sick, or alone, or ugly…
When you cant do anything right…
He’s waiting. He’s longing for your voice. Restless He waits. In His hands He can heal. In His hands he can free.
When life is going right…
When you are encouraged…
When you are victorious…
When you look in the mirror and you are beautiful, and radiant…
He wants to know. He is waiting to rejoice with you. He’s the first one to pop open a bottle of champagne. He’s the first one with the party hat on. He dances with you.
You see, He wants you. Just like you want Him. He could do it without you, of course, but He loves you so much, there’s a special ache in His heart for you, that only you can fill.
He would look awkward dancing by Himself. You make the dance glorious, beautiful, graceful, and purposeful. He loves you, and you love Him. You are one. He would look strong paddling a canoe in the rapids alone. But with you… it looks like an adventure. A team. A fight between fear and valor. You help Him. He could do it alone, but together… ah, He would only do it with you.
He shows you the sights, the smells, the sounds… together… you are one.
He loves you so much. He longs for you to love Him back. He throws pebbles at the window of your heart.
Wake up and let Him in…
Beloved.
The Window of Your Heart
You sit there, against that Wailing Wall of your room, wondering if you are ever going to make it though this mess they call Life. Everywhere you turn someone puts you down, and the tears that stain your heart mark the pain and the burden of your rejection. Love… you are yearning for love.
But wait! Hope is coming like the Spring’s beauty after Winter’s frost. You have not been abandoned, you are not alone. There is a Lover who pursues you, and longs for you to notice Him. He is waiting.
He loves you so much that he knocks at the door of your heart, and stands in line patiently with the others. He longs for you to pick him & invite Him into your heart, and His heart shatters each time you choose someone or something else to be the love of your life.
He loves you so much He puts His strongest, fastest angels to take care of you, and watches your every move. Tears spring to His eyes when you don’t accept His angel’s help and protection, and instead accept the strength of some mortal protector, who, in the end, cannot shield you from the Enemy’s attacks.
He loves you so much He wants to give you the whole world and He does. He gives you the moon, and the stars, and lies in the grass with you, pointing out every little point of light, His heart soaring because you like it. He took so long to paint the sky so it would be beautiful for you, hoping, knowing, that it would touch your heart.
Flowers? He loves you so much He brings you flowers, millions of flowers, and shows you his sense of humor by bringing them even in the form of dandelions or ragweed. He beautifully packages His flowers in colors of green and yellow and red and purple, orange, pink, blue, white… all the colors of the rainbow. He knows you love them, and they are labeled “From your Secret Admirer. You’ve always longed for a Secret Admirer, someone who pursued you because you were beautiful, alluring, lovely… well, you do.
He is so much in love with you that he doesn’t care about your past. He gets down on His knees and begs you: “I love you, I have loved you for as long as I remember. Please tell me that you love me,” He pleads.
He is valiant. He fights the demons that hold you, the addictions, the obsessions, the sin that has you in chains, a phantom of fear cast around your heart. He hears your screams to be rescued, loves you so much to throw Himself at the dragon and fight for you. He could have left you to die, there are other girls who are easier to come by, who would love it if He even gave them a glance. But no… He gave them up for you. He loves you, and will go to all lengths, all risks, to get you, to prove to you His love.
He is close, and sensitive, embracing you when your heart weeps, when your life breaks apart into a million pieces. He carries you when you get scared in the storm, and comes looking for you, crying out your name, when the hurricane of your thinking separates you. He tears up about your pain when you open up to him, and with gentle hands He heals you.
He is thoughtful. In the morning He wakes you softly with the rays of the sun and the melodious songs of birds. He whispers you good morning and kisses you with the soft breeze coming in through the open window. Even on a gloomy day he has a special surprise only for your heart to know and understand. He tells you of His plans, of His purpose, and how much He desires to be with you within the pages of His love letters to you. And He is downcast and so dejected when you pass up reading His words to you for some other book or method of leisure. You allow someone or something else to romance and allure your heart, and it brings tears to His eyes and pain to His heart. He knows how weak that someone or something is, and how weak you are.
He cries out to you, longs for you to look at Him. But your gaze is fixed on someone else. The Enemy. The Enemy has captured the gaze of His beloved.
He loves you so much that He waits, even though you left Him. When you realize that the Enemy’s tune-less murmur in your ear is taking you away from He who cherishes you, you will cry out to Him. He will valiantly rescue you again. He loves you so much He will throw thousands of angels up against the Enemy, only to get you back. And he loves you so much, he will rescue you again, and again, and again, and again. Nothing you can do will make Him get angry with you enough to leave you. And He will never let the Enemy harm you. He will not leave you, He will not desert you. Although you might reject Him, He will wait patiently, pursuing your heart until you return to his arms, safe once more.
But He does not wait motionless; no. Every single moment you are away, in the Enemy’s lair, he is resless. He calls for you, runs to you, trying to make you notice Him. He does not rest until you are rescued, safe. He pleads with you, begs you, trying to gently tell you that the way you are going leads to destruction, and heartache. His heart breaks when you let the Enemy plug your ears. He screams in anguish when you let the Enemy lead you, knowing it is towards Destruction.
“Take anything else!” He cries. “Take anything else! My home, my creation, my crown, even myself, if only you would spare my beloved! Take me instead, not her! Please!”
He loves you so much He ran into the land of Shadow to bring you out. The Enemy tied Him up with the chains destined for you. He was blamed for your addictions; He felt the pain of your abuse; He cried out when the burden of your sin was thrown upon him, wrung around His throat. He looked at you, His starry eyes tearing, as His Enemy pushed Him into the abyss, instead of you.
He loves you so much he took your past from you: your impurity, your abuse, your pain, your ugliness, your infliction, your depression, your loss, your disability, your weakness, your arrogance, your ignorance, your poverty, your nakedness, your embarrassment, your unloveableness, your scorn, your hurt, and ultimately, ultimately… your brokenness.
But… He is powerful. He is strong. So powerful, He defeated the Enemy. He defeated your sin! No longer does the Enemy’s lairs have power over you. Your addictions have been taken away from you… you are free! Your anger has been vanquished… Smile: you are free! You are whole, perfect, pure- the scars of abuse have been taken away… you are free! The traces of darkness, ugliness and depression have been washed away… He is victorious; rejoice! You are free! The loss, the wounds of that which was ripped away from you by Death, by Poverty… by the forces of the Enemy, are restored… You are free!
And He runs, galliantly, towards you, arms open wide, ready to accept you into them. Tears streaming joyfully down His face, the light and beauty of His Kingdom filling the defeated darkness of the Enemy, He throws you up into the air, and catches you, embracing you. Finally you are together, free. And when you are with Him, you are who you were made to be. He completes you.
Hand in hand He walks you down a glorious path in the woods. Butterflies, wild flowers, a shimmering brook rushing over smooth rocks and stones and cascading over them into a deliciously cool pond… Rabbits scamper as you swim and bask in the sunlight.
Then He pulls you up, out of the Valleys and into the Clouds. Up over the trees and into the mountains. The sunset sets the rocks afire. A warm, crackling campfire, roasting marshmallows and hot dogs and talking softly… You lean your head against His chest and even the chill of the starry night air can't get to you, because He is holding you. With Him, you are whole. You are free.
He shows you many things, talks to you. And He wants you to talk to Him, about everything. He wants you to let Him know you.
When you feel alone, head in your hands, back against a wall, He comes walking up the aisle with His hands shoved in His pockets. He gives you a small smile and squats next to you, eyes searching, asking you to tell Him what is wrong.
When you are happy, rejoicing over an accomplishment, He throws you a party. He breaks out a grin and invites all of your friends. “Look how fantastic she is… I don’t know what I’d do without her!” He exclaims.
When you are stressed, and cant seem to get anything right, His arms embrace your world and your heart, and just holds you. In His hands, you will be safe, and your heart will be healed. Your pain will soon go away, and in His hands you will be healed.
When the end seems to come too soon…
When you feel as if life is not worth living…
When you cant cope…
When you feel sick, or alone, or ugly…
When you cant do anything right…
He’s waiting. He’s longing for your voice. Restless He waits. In His hands He can heal. In His hands he can free.
When life is going right…
When you are encouraged…
When you are victorious…
When you look in the mirror and you are beautiful, and radiant…
He wants to know. He is waiting to rejoice with you. He’s the first one to pop open a bottle of champagne. He’s the first one with the party hat on. He dances with you.
You see, He wants you. Just like you want Him. He could do it without you, of course, but He loves you so much, there’s a special ache in His heart for you, that only you can fill.
He would look awkward dancing by Himself. You make the dance glorious, beautiful, graceful, and purposeful. He loves you, and you love Him. You are one. He would look strong paddling a canoe in the rapids alone. But with you… it looks like an adventure. A team. A fight between fear and valor. You help Him. He could do it alone, but together… ah, He would only do it with you.
He shows you the sights, the smells, the sounds… together… you are one.
He loves you so much. He longs for you to love Him back. He throws pebbles at the window of your heart.
Wake up and let Him in…
Beloved.
3.07.2010
Fearful Dreams, and Perfect Love
Recently I've been having very vivid dreams about things that could happen in my life. You know those dreams that you wake up and wonder, "Was that really a dream, or did that happen in real life?" And these dreams have actually been quite upsetting.
Last week I dreamed that one of my old piano teachers, who I really love and look up to, was angry with me about having a different teacher than her. She's totally not like that in real life, so I don't know how my subconscious came up with that!
Also, more recently I dreamed that on the first day of college, everyone except me knew what they were doing and where they were going. I knew no-one and had no idea where I was or even where my room was for that matter! I felt very lost and alone wandering the halls, trying to figure out what was going on. You know that sinking feeling where you don't really know what you're doing but you don't want anyone to know that you're lost... that's how I felt. When I woke up, I had to calm my heart and tell myself that wouldn't happen. But deep down inside, the doubt had been planted, no matter how I tried to shake it off as "just a dream."
As I talked it over with my mom, I realized that somehow, my fears were coming out in my dreams. Though maybe I wouldn't admit it to myself, I am scared about what it will be like at college, and about people I love getting mad at me. I thought I had conquered these fears, but here they were coming back in my life again. Was I ever to be rid of them?
Today God gave me the perfect answer. And I should have known it all along.
Perfect love casts out fear.
I know this, but I don't really know it. It's only been in my brain, not in my life. So the sermon this morning just hit home for me. The verses my pastor was preaching on were Ephesians 3:17b-19 "And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge - that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God."
This is the answer. This is how these fears can be completely removed and eradicated from my life. If I'm resting secure in God's love, filled up with Him, there's no room for any kind of fear! If I'm rooted in the soil of His love, my tree shall grow tall and firm. I need not fear the winds of change and uncertainty that might fell a weaker tree. And if I'm grounded in the sure foundation of His Word, my building shall be solid and steadfast. I need not fear the floods of doubt that try to eat away at my mortar.
I can rest securely, because I rest in God's unchanging, never-ending love. His love is deeper than my deepest sin, higher than my highest dreams, broader than the scope of my imagination, and longer than I can see or even think. For He loves me with an everlasting love!
This is my foundation. This is my security. This is the perfect love that casts out all my fears.
Last week I dreamed that one of my old piano teachers, who I really love and look up to, was angry with me about having a different teacher than her. She's totally not like that in real life, so I don't know how my subconscious came up with that!
Also, more recently I dreamed that on the first day of college, everyone except me knew what they were doing and where they were going. I knew no-one and had no idea where I was or even where my room was for that matter! I felt very lost and alone wandering the halls, trying to figure out what was going on. You know that sinking feeling where you don't really know what you're doing but you don't want anyone to know that you're lost... that's how I felt. When I woke up, I had to calm my heart and tell myself that wouldn't happen. But deep down inside, the doubt had been planted, no matter how I tried to shake it off as "just a dream."
As I talked it over with my mom, I realized that somehow, my fears were coming out in my dreams. Though maybe I wouldn't admit it to myself, I am scared about what it will be like at college, and about people I love getting mad at me. I thought I had conquered these fears, but here they were coming back in my life again. Was I ever to be rid of them?
Today God gave me the perfect answer. And I should have known it all along.
Perfect love casts out fear.
I know this, but I don't really know it. It's only been in my brain, not in my life. So the sermon this morning just hit home for me. The verses my pastor was preaching on were Ephesians 3:17b-19 "And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge - that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God."
This is the answer. This is how these fears can be completely removed and eradicated from my life. If I'm resting secure in God's love, filled up with Him, there's no room for any kind of fear! If I'm rooted in the soil of His love, my tree shall grow tall and firm. I need not fear the winds of change and uncertainty that might fell a weaker tree. And if I'm grounded in the sure foundation of His Word, my building shall be solid and steadfast. I need not fear the floods of doubt that try to eat away at my mortar.
I can rest securely, because I rest in God's unchanging, never-ending love. His love is deeper than my deepest sin, higher than my highest dreams, broader than the scope of my imagination, and longer than I can see or even think. For He loves me with an everlasting love!
This is my foundation. This is my security. This is the perfect love that casts out all my fears.
2.14.2010
Amazing Love
"Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends." John 15:13
(Jesus speaking) "As the Father has loved me, so I have loved you. Now remain in my love. " John 15:9
John Chapter 15 is one of my favorite chapters of the Bible. In it, Jesus is teaching his disciples before his death about how they are to love each other just as He loves them. Jesus is the ultimate example of love - he loved us so much that he was willing to lay down his life. And he didn't just lay it down for his friends, he laid it down for his enemies as well! No wonder we sing of His "Amazing Love."
Jesus also calls us to love each other with the same kind of amazing love. In John 13:34-35, He says, "A new command I give you: love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another." [italics mine] There it is, clear as day. We must love one another as He has loved us!
This is a tall order, for sure. How can I love others as Jesus loved me? I can't sacrifice my life for them, can I? No, we can't actually die for those around us like Jesus did, but we can sacrifice things for them such as our time. Pray today and ask God how you can show His love, His amazing love, to those around you - even if they're not particularly lovable. Who knows what God can do through you if you're willing to show His love to others?
