Don't you hate it when you procrastinate? It seems so easy - just forget about this thing, push that thing aside until tomorrow, telling yourself you can always start fresh in the morning - yet it starts you on a steep spiral downhill. Before you know it, you're floundering around at the bottom, with all the things you put off and brushed aside falling down around your ears. And you wonder how you can ever get out again.
That's the way I've felt the past couple of weeks. I easily fall into the temptation of procrastinating, especially when there's not a lot of scheduled things in my life. I put things I like to do first, such as going on the computer, blogging, facebook, etc. All the things I don't enjoy so much or things that are actual work get put off until later... which usually means they don't happen. I've wanted to stop it, of course, but I've always procrastinated with that too!
Today I was praying about this, and I realized that the reason it's so easy to fall into this and so hard to get out is because I don't have my priorities straight. I always put myself first; in front of God, others, and what I ought to do. I'm being selfish with my time!
Here is part of the prayer I prayed this morning (I usually write down my prayers): "Dear God, You see the thoughts and intentions of my heart. Please forgive me for procrastinating, and being selfish with my time, thoughts, and actions. I want You to be on the throne of my heart, not myself. Please help me to overcome this, so I can live as a child of light, not stumbling around in the darkness. I invite you back onto the throne of my heart to rule this kingdom that is so wayward and unruly. Throw out all the sinful, selfish desires I've furnished my heart with, and refurbish it with a longing for Your glory. Kindle the lamps of love and commitment and diligence for your name. Make this heart a kingdom for Your glory! Amen."
After I prayed that prayer, I felt a sense of determination and boldness that I had not felt before. I was ready to conquer - with God on the throne, directing my thoughts, actions, and heart. I knew that He would help me get rid of this procrastination, little by little. After all, how can I procrastinate when the Almighty God is the one directing my steps?